Friday, January 04, 2008
Hello Everyone!!
I have a story for you that I think you'll like and I also think maybe some of you can relate to this guy:
'Living with Snow' -diary of a Snow shoveler
December 8- 6:00 pm Yeah!! It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cups of hot cocoa and sat by the window watching the huge, soft flakes drift down from heaven. It looked like a Thomas Kinkade print. We even had a crackling fire in the fireplace. So romantic, we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow!
December 9- We woke up to a calm quiet day and a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely place in the whole world? Moving here was the best idea I've ever had! I shoveled for the first time in years and felt like a boy again. I did both our driveway and the sidewalks. This afternoon the snowplow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. What a perfect life!
December 12- The sun has melted all our lovely snow. Such a disappointment! My neighbor tells me not to worry, we'll definitely have a white Christmas. No snow on Christmas would be awful! Bob says we'll have so much snow by the end of winter that I'll never want to see snow again. I don't think that's possible. Bob is such a nice guy. I'm glad he's our neighbor.
December 14- Snow, lovely snow! 8 inches last night. The temperature dropped to 20 below.
The cold makes everything sparkle so. The wind took my breath away, but I warmed up by shoveling the driveway and sidewalks. This is the life! The snowplow came by this afternoon and buried everything again. I didn't realize I would have to do quite this much shoveling, but I'll certainly get back in shape this way. I wish I wouldn't huff and puff so. Bob wanted me to sign-up for his snowplow service. I told him I could handle my own snow removal. I like Bob but I think he was being a bit pushy.
December 15- 20 inches forecast. Sold my van and bought a 4x4 Blazer. Bought snow tires for the wife's car and 2 extra shovels. Stocked the freezer. The wife wants a wood stove in case the electricity goes out. I think that's silly. We aren't in Alaska, after all.
December 16- Ice storm this morning. Fell on my ass on the ice in the driveway putting down salt. Hurt like hell. The wife laughed for an hour which I think was very cruel.
December 17- Still way below freezing. Roads are too icy to go anywhere. Electricity was off for 5 hours. I had to pile the blankets on to stay warm. Nothing to do but stare at the wife and try not to irritate her. Guess I should have bought a wood stove, but won't admit it to her. I hate it when she's right. I can't believe I'm freezing to death in my own living room.
December 20- Electricity is back on, but had another 14 inches of the white stuff last night. More shoveling! Took all day. The darn snowplow came by twice. Tried to find a neighbor kid to shovel, but they said they're too busy playing hockey. I think they're lying. Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snowblower and they're out. Might have another shipment in March. I think they're lying. Bob says I have to shovel or the City will have it done and bill me. I think he's lying.
December 22- Bob was right about a white Christmas because 13 more inches of the white stuff fell today, and it's so cold it probably won't melt 'til August. Took me 45 minutes to get all dressed up to go out to shovel and then I had to pee. By the time I got undressed, went to the bathroom, then got dressed again, I was too tired to shovel. I tried to hire Bob who has a plow on his truck for the rest of the winter, but he says he's too busy. I think he's lying.
December 23rd- Only 2 inches of snow today and it warmed up to O. The wife wanted me to decorate the front of the house this morning. What is she... nuts?!! Why didn't she tell me to do that a month ago? She says she did, but I think she's lying.
December 24th- 6 inches. Snow packed so hard by snowplow, I broke the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If I ever catch the S.O.B. who drives that snowplow, I'll drag him through the snow by his ears and beat him to death with my broken shovel. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling and then he comes down the street at 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over where I've just been. Tonight the wife wanted me to sing Christmas Carols with her and open our presents, but I was too busy watching for the darn snowplow.
December 25th- Merry Christmas! 20 more inches of the darn slop tonight! Now we're snowed in. The idea of shoveling makes my blood boil. I Hate this snow! Then the snowplow driver came by asking for a donation and I hit him over the head with my shovel. The wife says I have a bad attitude. I think she's an idiot. If I have to watch "It's a Wonderful life" one more time, I'm going to stuff her into the microwave.
December 26th- Still snowed in. Why the heck did I ever move here? It was all HER idea. She's really getting on my nerves.
December 27th- Temperature dropped to 30 below and the pipes froze; plumber came after 14 hours of waiting for him. He only charged me $1,400 to replace all my pipes.
December 28th- Warmed up to -20 degrees. Still snowed in. SHE is driving me crazy!!!
December 29th- 10 more inches. Bob says I have to shovel the roof or it could cave in. That's the silliest thing I have EVER heard. How dumb does he think I am?
December 30th- Roof caved in. I beat up the snow plow driver and now he is suing me for a million dollars. The wife went home to her mother. Nine more inches forecast.
December 31st- I set fire to what's left of the house. No more shoveling.
The City came by today and shoveled the sidewalk and presented me with a Bill for $300 for their services.*
****************************************************
Blessings! -Missygirl*
I have a story for you that I think you'll like and I also think maybe some of you can relate to this guy:
'Living with Snow' -diary of a Snow shoveler
December 8- 6:00 pm Yeah!! It started to snow. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cups of hot cocoa and sat by the window watching the huge, soft flakes drift down from heaven. It looked like a Thomas Kinkade print. We even had a crackling fire in the fireplace. So romantic, we felt like newlyweds again. I love snow!
December 9- We woke up to a calm quiet day and a beautiful blanket of crystal white snow covering every inch of the landscape. What a fantastic sight! Can there be a more lovely place in the whole world? Moving here was the best idea I've ever had! I shoveled for the first time in years and felt like a boy again. I did both our driveway and the sidewalks. This afternoon the snowplow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. What a perfect life!
December 12- The sun has melted all our lovely snow. Such a disappointment! My neighbor tells me not to worry, we'll definitely have a white Christmas. No snow on Christmas would be awful! Bob says we'll have so much snow by the end of winter that I'll never want to see snow again. I don't think that's possible. Bob is such a nice guy. I'm glad he's our neighbor.
December 14- Snow, lovely snow! 8 inches last night. The temperature dropped to 20 below.
The cold makes everything sparkle so. The wind took my breath away, but I warmed up by shoveling the driveway and sidewalks. This is the life! The snowplow came by this afternoon and buried everything again. I didn't realize I would have to do quite this much shoveling, but I'll certainly get back in shape this way. I wish I wouldn't huff and puff so. Bob wanted me to sign-up for his snowplow service. I told him I could handle my own snow removal. I like Bob but I think he was being a bit pushy.
December 15- 20 inches forecast. Sold my van and bought a 4x4 Blazer. Bought snow tires for the wife's car and 2 extra shovels. Stocked the freezer. The wife wants a wood stove in case the electricity goes out. I think that's silly. We aren't in Alaska, after all.
December 16- Ice storm this morning. Fell on my ass on the ice in the driveway putting down salt. Hurt like hell. The wife laughed for an hour which I think was very cruel.
December 17- Still way below freezing. Roads are too icy to go anywhere. Electricity was off for 5 hours. I had to pile the blankets on to stay warm. Nothing to do but stare at the wife and try not to irritate her. Guess I should have bought a wood stove, but won't admit it to her. I hate it when she's right. I can't believe I'm freezing to death in my own living room.
December 20- Electricity is back on, but had another 14 inches of the white stuff last night. More shoveling! Took all day. The darn snowplow came by twice. Tried to find a neighbor kid to shovel, but they said they're too busy playing hockey. I think they're lying. Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snowblower and they're out. Might have another shipment in March. I think they're lying. Bob says I have to shovel or the City will have it done and bill me. I think he's lying.
December 22- Bob was right about a white Christmas because 13 more inches of the white stuff fell today, and it's so cold it probably won't melt 'til August. Took me 45 minutes to get all dressed up to go out to shovel and then I had to pee. By the time I got undressed, went to the bathroom, then got dressed again, I was too tired to shovel. I tried to hire Bob who has a plow on his truck for the rest of the winter, but he says he's too busy. I think he's lying.
December 23rd- Only 2 inches of snow today and it warmed up to O. The wife wanted me to decorate the front of the house this morning. What is she... nuts?!! Why didn't she tell me to do that a month ago? She says she did, but I think she's lying.
December 24th- 6 inches. Snow packed so hard by snowplow, I broke the shovel. Thought I was having a heart attack. If I ever catch the S.O.B. who drives that snowplow, I'll drag him through the snow by his ears and beat him to death with my broken shovel. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling and then he comes down the street at 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over where I've just been. Tonight the wife wanted me to sing Christmas Carols with her and open our presents, but I was too busy watching for the darn snowplow.
December 25th- Merry Christmas! 20 more inches of the darn slop tonight! Now we're snowed in. The idea of shoveling makes my blood boil. I Hate this snow! Then the snowplow driver came by asking for a donation and I hit him over the head with my shovel. The wife says I have a bad attitude. I think she's an idiot. If I have to watch "It's a Wonderful life" one more time, I'm going to stuff her into the microwave.
December 26th- Still snowed in. Why the heck did I ever move here? It was all HER idea. She's really getting on my nerves.
December 27th- Temperature dropped to 30 below and the pipes froze; plumber came after 14 hours of waiting for him. He only charged me $1,400 to replace all my pipes.
December 28th- Warmed up to -20 degrees. Still snowed in. SHE is driving me crazy!!!
December 29th- 10 more inches. Bob says I have to shovel the roof or it could cave in. That's the silliest thing I have EVER heard. How dumb does he think I am?
December 30th- Roof caved in. I beat up the snow plow driver and now he is suing me for a million dollars. The wife went home to her mother. Nine more inches forecast.
December 31st- I set fire to what's left of the house. No more shoveling.
The City came by today and shoveled the sidewalk and presented me with a Bill for $300 for their services.*
****************************************************
Blessings! -Missygirl*
# posted by Missygirl : 2:58 PM
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